Most scientists and psychologists agree that The Fear of Success is similar to The Fear of Failure.
It doesn’t matter either if we are a woman, or a man: The Fear of Success can subconsciously haunt us, resulting in us repeatedly sabotaging our goals and dreams.
The reasons for developing The Fear of Success may vary from person to person.
It might be that we subconsciously believe that we won’t be able to maintain our success and will eventually fail anyway.
It might be that we subconsciously believe that we are not good enough to reach for our dreams or – it might be that we associate success in our mind with things that we subconsciously believe to be “negative”, “wrong” or even “disgusting.”
We might subconsciously believe that to achieve success in life we need to be cunning, ruthless, arrogant, bullying, heartless, etc. We might even hold resentment in our heart toward some successful people whom, for whatever reason, we despise and do not want to “end up” being like them.
Or – we may feel some level of guilt or shame when we see less fortunate members of your family or co-workers who hadn’t had any success.
What happens when The Fear of Success drives our life:
We may avoid or procrastinate on big projects, especially if they could lead to recognition.
We may compromise our own agenda or goals so that it won’t cause any problems or conflicts in our family or organization.
We may sabotage our own efforts just moments before achieving our dreamed of or thoroughly planned success. Or we might give up already at the beginning and never start working on our plans at all.
If you find out that any of the above is applicable to you – it means that you might have a subconscious Fear of Success.
Its symptoms are often similar to the symptoms of The Fear of Failure. It is because The Fear of Success is rooted in our imprinted belief that success will bring us sorrow.
You might believe that success may alienate you from your family, because of working longer hours, or being asked for favors and money.
You might be afraid that you will be criticized more when you are “higher up”, and that your friends or family will react to you with jealousy, cynicism, and that you might lose your loved ones.
Or you simply might be afraid that upon accomplishing your goals, you will intensely regret that you didn’t act sooner.
Whatever reason hides behind your Fear of Success – it is effectively sabotaging your happiness.
How to overcome The Fear of Success:
Step 1: Ask yourself the following questions:
Do I really think that it is better to be unhappy in an unhappy crowd, instead of proving to others that everything is possible, and if I can succeed they could do it too?
– Do I actually believe that my family or friends are happier because I haven’t achieved my success yet?
– Am I sure that my success needs to lead to disappointments and bring me sorrow in the end? If so: what makes me think that way?
Ask yourself similar questions, bringing to the surface each of the issues that may subconsciously sabotage your life. Answer them truthfully on a piece of paper – compare pros and cons.
Step 2: Notice and accept the simple fact: If you don’t follow your dreams, if you don’t reach for your goals – you will end up unhappy, frustrated and disappointed anyway.
Giving up on your dreams will definitely bring you sorrow. You can be sure of that.
Step 3: Notice that every human being on this planet lives his/her own unique life. Every single person has a choice how to stay pure in their heart, and how to conduct their own actions. There is no need to succeed in a way that is not in harmony with what you hold as precious and important.
You are a unique being, one in billions, with your own story to tell. You can be successful on your own terms: you do not need to behave in any other way than that which is TRUE TO YOU.
Step 4: Realize that your Fear of Success is stopping you from fully, and happily, experiencing your life:
Fear of Success = fear of becoming your true self
Fear of becoming your true self = not believing in yourself
Not believing in yourself = wasting your potential
Wasting your potential = lack of happiness
Lack of happiness = lack of joy of life
Lack of joy of life = lack of fulfillment/success
*Life minus Fear of Success = happiness/fulfillment/success
Step 5: Now you can admit to yourself how absolutely wonderful it would be to follow your Heart, love your life and share your success with those you love.
You are smart. You are strong.
Now you can be happy as well.
REMEMBER ALSO: OUR SUBCONSCIOUS rules 90% of our thinking and behavior. It is responsible for our habits, emotions, automatic reactions, defensive mechanisms etc., which may keep you stuck in unwanted situations in life. You can reprogram your subconscious and get rid of the negative patterns stopping you from Living The Life You Want.
“I open myself to the possibility of ignoring limitations and going beyond self-imposed boundaries. I will no longer let my fears keep me from fulfilling my dreams. I am getting ready to step out of the box and unlock my true potential.”
“More and more I trust the wisdom that surfaces from within me. More and more I am sure I will find out my real life purpose. I have already experienced glimpses of it, whenever I let myself dream without involving my Ego, fears or societal pressures. Each of us lives a unique story, and each of us has a unique purpose. No matter what my purpose is, big or small, it is my Own Truth and my own mark I am to leave in the world. I am thrilled to be me, and be able to discover what I still want to do in my life.” – From the award-winnig book “365 (+1) Affirmations to Create a Great Life” by Johanna Kern.